Hannah and The Fudge

January 9, 2011

Hannah has a beautiful piece of homemade (not by her) fudge before her. Knowing that white sugar and butter aren’t power foods for Hannah, she has them only on rare occasions. Hannah sensed that tasting this fudge could bring some pleasure. Hannah was also alone, she rarely finds herself alone with butter and sugar. She unwrapped the fudge and as the crinkle of the package opened she smelled the chocolate and peanut butter emerge almost as perfume. She broke off a small piece and let it melt in her mouth. It was an explosion of flavor, intense and she indeed felt pleasure. She thought of how her husband would love the gooey candy. She imagined sharing the candy and taking pleasure from the enjoyment her husband would find in it.

Hannah struggles with over indulging as a result of all her years of deprivation. She became excited about the taste and wanted just one more bite. No one was around to share her taste experience, so just one more bite. This bite tasted much sweeter than the first. Almost too sweet. It was still good, but just not quite the same. She looked at the last of the fudge. Would saving this silly little piece of fudge for her husband seem strange. It was just one bite after all. So she decided to take the last bite and be done with the fudge.

This bite held no pleasure for Hannah. It made her stomach feel a bit sick and she was pulled suddenly into that whirl of sugar-buzz. She quickly grabbed for some water and drank. Later greeted by her sugar headache she thought back to the first pleasurable bite of fudge. Yes, that was a good bite.

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Imagine another story. One where the fudge was cut into 5 tiny pieces and each shared after a meal or with a cup tea among 5 members of the family. Each bite could bring a tiny little taste of pleasure without the ill effects of over indulging.

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

exhale. return to center. January 9, 2011 at 2:58 pm

boy can i relate. for me it was peanut butter cookies (you know the ones that glisten with sugar and have a big ol’ hershey’s kiss in the middle).

yeah. that was my fudge a couple of days ago.

thanks for your honesty.

xo

~e

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Hannah January 9, 2011 at 5:49 pm

Oh no, that was a purely fictional story! wink…

Yes, peanut butter and chocolate, yum!

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Angela January 9, 2011 at 5:44 pm

Great post. I can relate completely. I am that way with sugar cookies and gummi bears. Luckily I am doing pretty well not over-indulging with these lately. There is nothing like sharing even though my brain says, “Mine! Mine!”. It’s good to learn to recognize that fine line-always working on it.
Peace, Angela
Angela recently posted..Blessings and Epiphany

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Hannah January 9, 2011 at 5:52 pm

Angela, I’m excited for the cleanse coming and for you to be a part of it, no gummies on that one!!!!

And oh the mine, mine brain talk!!!!

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